Nice people finish last - but some finish first too
The paradox of kindness and achievement
Imagine two professionals: one always plays their cards close to the chest, competing aggressively. The other, generous and considerate, builds strong relationships. Who do you think achieves more? The answer isn’t straightforward.
In a world obsessed with competitiveness, kindness often seems like a weakness. Yet, the reality is more complex. Sometimes, being nice can hold you back. Other times, it propels you forward.
This blog explores how qualities like kindness and competitiveness shape success. We’ll look at real stories, research insights, and practical tips. The goal? To help you understand how to leverage both traits for your own journey.
The cultural landscape of success
Different cultures view success differently. In Australia, for example, collaboration and fairness are highly valued. Leaders who show empathy tend to inspire loyalty. Conversely, in more competitive environments, a ruthless edge might seem necessary.
For international newcomers, understanding these nuances is vital. What works back home may not translate directly in Australia. Adjusting your approach can make a big difference.
When kindness helps you succeed
Building Trust and Loyalty
Being kind fosters trust. This is crucial in almost every career. People prefer to work with those they trust. Building genuine relationships opens doors and creates opportunities.
Example: Sarah, a migrant from the Philippines, volunteered to mentor new colleagues. Her kindness earned her respect, leading to a promotion within two years.
Creating a Supportive Network
A strong network offers support, advice, and sometimes even job opportunities. Kindness makes you memorable and relatable.
Tip: Take time to listen to colleagues’ concerns. Practice gratitude. Small acts of kindness go a long way.
Enhancing Leadership
Empathetic leaders motivate teams better. They create positive work environments that boost productivity.
Research insight: A study by Harvard Business Review shows that leaders who show genuine concern lead teams with higher engagement and retention.
When competitiveness might be necessary
Standing Out in a Crowded Market
Sometimes, being competitive helps you differentiate. If everyone has similar skills, a bold approach can set you apart.
Example: John, an Australian property investor, aggressively pursued deals with quick decision-making. His assertiveness paid off with profitable investments.
Negotiation Power
Competition sharpens your negotiation skills. Being assertive often gets you better deals, whether negotiating a salary or a business contract.
Overcoming Barriers
In some cases, tough competition is unavoidable. It can push you beyond your comfort zone and accelerate growth.
Warning: Balance is key. Excessive aggressiveness can damage relationships and reputation.
Finding the sweet spot
The most successful individuals often blend kindness with healthy competitiveness. They know when to be generous and when to be assertive.
Practical strategies:
- Prioritize authenticity: Genuine kindness beats superficial gestures.
- Set clear goals: Know when to push hard or hold back.
- Develop emotional intelligence: Recognize when others need support or assertiveness.
- Maintain professionalism: Keep relationships respectful, even when competing.
Quote: "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about." — Ian Maclaren
Success stories of nice people who finished first
The collaborative CEO
Anna, a tech startup founder in Australia, prioritized team wellbeing. Her empathetic leadership created a loyal, innovative team. Her company went public within five years, outperforming competitors.
The generous negotiator
Luis, an international property buyer, transparency and kindness helped him secure favorable deals. By building trust with agents and sellers, he often negotiated prices below market value, saving thousands.
The supportive mentor
Kobayashi, a migrant and financial adviser, helped numerous clients navigate the Australian mortgage system. His genuine care earned client loyalty. Many returned for multiple transactions and recommended him widely.
Lessons learned
- Kindness is a strategic asset. It builds trust, loyalty, and a strong reputation.
- Competitiveness can be a tool, but used wisely. Excessive rivalry damages relationships.
- Balance is everything. Know your environment, and adapt accordingly.
- Emotional intelligence enhances both kindness and assertiveness.
Final thoughts
Success isn’t a zero-sum game. Nice people can finish first, sometimes even more strongly than their more aggressive counterparts. The key lies in understanding when to show kindness and when to compete.
In Australia’s diverse cultural landscape, blending empathy with assertiveness can set you apart. Cultivate genuine relationships while maintaining a healthy competitive edge. That combination can propel you toward your goals.
Remember, success is a journey. Stay true to your values, learn from each experience, and adapt your approach. As the saying goes, "Nice people finish last"—but often, they finish first in the ways that truly matter.

Director
With over 20 years of experience as a mortgage broker, Madhu specializes in helping migrants and expats find loans suited to their unique financial situations. Her expertise in navigating complex lending requirements and understanding diverse financial backgrounds has helped countless families achieve their Australian property dreams.